When a child is not a dream...

As if with the last of her strength, Hanna sank into a chair, took out a pack of handkerchiefs from her purse and said:

“My mother died of uterine cancer. I have the same symptoms. I'm afraid.

I unfolded the cards, hoping that no matter what they showed, I could cheer her up a little. The Tarot spread consisted, in particular, of the Ace of Wands, the Moon and the VIII of Swords.

No, it's not cancer! You are pregnant. It is true that the pregnancy is in danger and will result in a caesarean section, but the baby will be born healthy, I said with relief.

"But... I can't have children," she muttered.

“Nevertheless, you will carry them. It means one thing. Son, I said.

To be sure, I took three more cards from the deck. They confirmed previous findings, but did not inspire optimism. Motherhood was difficult and sad. I was also troubled by the assumption that a woman would not be able to count on her partner.

What should I have done in this situation? Warn Hanna about the pregnancy? She was already in it. To announce that soon she would have to deal with her own fate? And who can guarantee that such a prediction will not lead to a deterioration in relations with her husband and child? ... So I just emphasized that she should not rely too much on her husband, because he could become a serious disappointment for her. in the future - and I decided to wait for developments. 

i don't want a baby

Six months later, Hanna sat back in my office and said, shaking her fingers:

- A few days after visiting you, I discovered that I had a pathology of pregnancy. My husband came every day. He brought treats, stroked his hands, kissed him. He assured that he was happy and already feels like a dad. But I kept crying… Why? Because Toto was supposed to be born, and I never wanted to be a mother. After all, not all people have to reproduce. But there was no way I could tell Adam that I wanted to take his child. Or at least wait for nature to do its thing and miscarry. As a result, out of love for my husband, I allowed myself to be healed.

I am now in my seventh month. I still feel rebellious. Something happens against my will, and despite the extreme disagreement, I must bear the consequences. I can't tell anyone how things are. I tried to speak to my sister and immediately recoiled from the judgment in her eyes. What to do?

Then I suggested that she meet with a therapist who would not evaluate the patient's attitude, but would help her cope with the crisis. Hannah's current problems stem from childhood, which affects everyone's adult life - and her problems with her father.

The Pope did not accept Khanka. He was cold, powerful. He punished for any nonsense. In the subconscious of a woman, a pattern was imprinted like: I am a nonentity, and every man is a threat to me. This long-standing fear passed on to the spouse and will certainly affect the attitude towards the son.

Unfortunately, tarot diagnostics is one hundred percent proven. I don't know why she didn't see a psychologist. No doubt she thought she could do it. But after the birth of the baby, she did not receive support.

i can't love himAdam did not understand his wife's dilemma. He called postpartum depression a woman's invention. He accused her of lack of commitment, but he himself was not going to do with a young mother. Besides, my son didn't look like a happy, smiling doll. He was nervous and screamed all night. Freshly baked dad lost his enthusiasm. He came to the conclusion that having children is not fun at all. He began to run away to work, meet colleagues, and it is likely that soon he will run away for real.

“Actually, little Antek has only me. And I feel sorry for him because I can't love him. I am completely helpless in relation to him, she sobbed during the next visit.

Taro announced a divorce. This time, the breakup of the family led to good things. The Empress appeared in the system, which meant that Hannah would find a warm person along the way who would take care of the boy.

This also happened. To earn extra money after her husband left, Hannah rented out a room to a single XNUMX-year-old woman who loved children. The women became friends. Gradually, Hannah's fears subsided. She knew that there was someone nearby who would help at any time.

Maria Bigoshevskaya